Matt O’Connor
Any professional sports team needs a good mascot, and the NFL is in no shortage of them. While not every one of the 32 teams features one, the teams that do have accompanying mascots vary wildly in terms of design and appeal. When it comes to what qualifies as a good mascot, I’ll mainly be looking for how well the character is designed and whether or not they fit their team’s established branding. This is my personal ranking of every single NFL Mascot.
#27: T.D (Miami Dolphins)
All of the mascots at the bottom of the lists are the ones that I would be legitimately scared to be around. The way his head looks really rubs me the wrong way. The combination of the big beady eyes and the oddly proportioned nose make for a mascot that I wouldn’t want to see in the stands. While it does fit the criteria for the theming that the Dolphins are going for, I think they really missed the mark on this one.
#26: Major Tuddy (Washington Commanders)
This guy just looks really ugly to me, and Tuddy here doesn’t really fit all that well when it comes to the Commanders and their brand. I know it’s weird to dock points for something like this, but the material of the mascot costume doesn’t look appealing at all. While he isn’t as unnerving as T.D, Tuddy’s expression and facial structure still creep me out a bit.
#25: Rowdy (Dallas Cowboys)
You’re going to notice a pattern with the next few placements on the list. I’m generally not a fan of human based mascots, as most of them come off as unsettling to me. In terms of the NFL, Rowdy is the worst of the bunch. I like the cowboy emphasis, but they could’ve just gotten a human performer instead of a suit and it would look so much better.
#24: Pat Patriot (New England Patriots)
Everything that applied to Rowdy also applies here. I don’t like the overly exaggerated face, and a human performer would’ve done wonders for the design. I do like the cartoonish features of the face, which propels Pat ever so slightly up on the list. He’s not as creepy as the mascots below him, but I would still say that I’m not a fan.
#23: Sourdough Sam (San Francisco 49ers)
I don’t know what it is about this guy, but there’s something about him that just doesn’t sit right with me. I like the prospector angle, but he’s still got those creepy humanoid features that I don’t really like on mascots. Sourdough Sam’s got a fun name, and he’s at the very least slightly less creepy than the other mascots before him on the list.
#22: Viktor (Minnesota Vikings)
This is the first mascot that I think has an actually appealing design. While Viktor does dip a bit into uncanny valley territory, his overly exaggerated personality really works nicely with the Viking based design. I also really like the Vikings color palette, and Viktor pulls it off rather well. It’s not an amazing costume design, but it’s just appealing enough to get a pass from me.
#21: Captain Fear (Tampa Bay Buccaneers)
In the same vein as Viktor, Captain Fear has a fun design despite being a little on the creepy side. The pirate flair is on full display here, and the sword is a nice touch. The eyes are pretty unnerving, so that loses Captain Fear some points. It’s a pretty decent design for the most part, but it’s a crime that he doesn’t have a little parrot with him at all times.
#20: Steely McBeam (Pittsburgh Steelers)
The best of the mascots with humanoid designs. While the mouth does look a bit unsettling at times, Steely here doesn’t have the keep factor that all of the mascots below him fell victim to in one way or another. The hard hat and collared shirt really stand out and emphasize the team’s brand rather well. For the most part, I gel with Steely.
#19: T-Rac (Tennessee Titans)
This guy’s really goofy looking, but he’s got a bit of charm to him. T-Rac being a raccoon since that’s Tennessee’s state animal was a fun choice, but the tongue constantly sticking out doesn’t look good to me. But on the other hand, I really like the comically oversized tail, so maybe the tongue critique is a bit hypocritical. I like T-Rac a fine amount.
#18: K.C. Wolf (Kansas City Chiefs)
I cannot stand this guy’s googly eyes, and I was originally rather confused as to why the mascot for the Chiefs was a wolf. Turns out, K.C. was based on a group of rowdy fans called the “wolfpack” who sat in the old stadium for the Chiefs. Definitely a deep cut reference, but it makes me appreciate their mascot a lot more. K.C. is growing on me.
#17: Chomps (Cleveland Browns)
Cleveland has a few mascots. But for simplicity’s sake, I decided to just focus on Chomps since he’s usually the main one for the Browns. Chomps being a dog is a fun reference to their bleachers being called the “Dawg Pound”. His expression looks a little silly, but the costume still looks nice and Chomps seems like a fun guy to be around.
#16: Jaxson de Ville (Jacksonville Jaguars)
Jaxson’s got a fun vibe going on. The snazzy sunglasses really complement the costume’s bright yellow and blue color scheme. His face looks a little silly, but I still like his design overall and he’s got that vibrant persona that a good mascot needs. He’s also typically the mascot that I associate with the absolutely insane off the wall stunts.
#15: Who Dey (Cincinnati Bengals)
Who Dey shares a lot of the same appeal that Jaxson has. He’s bright, colorful and always full of energy. Having such a distinctive look and/or personality pretty much always remains as one of the mascot principles for me. While he is a bit forgettable, I still really enjoy his design and the shenanigans that he gets himself into.
#14: Freddie Falcon (Atlanta Falcons)
At first, the gigantic eyes kind of creeped me out a bit. But overtime, they really added to the design for me and I think Freddie’s kind of underrated. He’s got that “I’m just happy to be here” kind of vibe. Also, bird themed mascots have always been much more appealing to me, so Freddie gets some bonus points in that regard.
#13: Roary (Detroit Lions)
In many ways, Roary’s energy is unmatched. He strikes a good balance between being huggable and being athletic. His appearance isn’t super creative more than being just a lion, but that simplicity works for him. Any mascot with a pun in their name also immediately skyrockets up the list.
#12: Gumbo (New Orleans Saints)
Everything that Chomps got wrong, Gumbo gets right. Gumbo’s design really leans into the Saint Bernard influence with a comically large tongue. But unlike T-Rac, Gumbo pulls it off because of the Saint Bernard’s reputation of being a slobbery dog species. Overall, a pretty fun design that has some strong thematic connections.
#11: Sir Purr (Carolina Panthers)
Definitely the most marketable mascot of the bunch. Sir Purr’s got the cuteness aspect nailed down perfectly, but he’s also got that mischievous look in his eyes that lend to the antics that these mascots often get into. The only reason he’s not higher is that I wish he had a little bit of moxie or edge to him to make him seem more entertaining.
#10: Billy Buffalo (Buffalo Bills)
At first glance, Billy Buffalo looks quite strange. But that’s just it, it’s his strange appearance and oversized head that make him so appealing to me. The bright blue fur also really catches your eye and fits well with the team’s branding. A great mascot and one that really takes the team’s personality and style to the next level.
#9: Staley Da Bear (Chicago Bears)
While he’s not as cute as some of the mascots before him, Staley more than makes up for it with his rough and tough look and the fact he’s named after the team’s founder. The reference to Bill Swerski’s Superfans from Saturday Night Live also gives Staley some extra bonus points. On top of that, his design is also very solid all around.
#8: Blitz (Seattle Seahawks)
If we were talking about Blitz’s old design, he would’ve placed much lower on the list. But his current design works really well. The striking color combo utilizing the neon green makes Blitz really stand out amongst his fellow avian based mascots. I tend to be biased towards bird based characters, and Blitz is certainly no exception.
#7: Rampage (Los Angeles Rams)
This guy was once described as having “the coating of a stuffed animal, but the build of a superhero.”, and that description could not be more accurate. On top of being a name with a pun, Rampage also gives off the strong, fan pleasing personality that any good mascot should have. Really fun design with an extra fun name.
#6: Miles (Denver Broncos)
Miles has a look in his eyes that means business, but his design also lends itself to the classic mascot based mischief that will often occur during home games. While he is sort of lacking the cuteness aspect, he makes up for it for constantly having a strong presence during games and drawing your attention every time he shows up.
#5: Edgar, Allan and Poe (Baltimore Ravens)
We’ve entered the Top 5! While other teams on the list had multiple mascots, Edgar, Allan and Poe are a packaged deal and I felt that it wouldn’t be right to pick just one. I love it when sports teams give their mascots their own backstories, and the Ravens have really flashed out their triplets by giving them personalities inspired by different aspects of their NFL. Definitely one of the most creative ways of going about creating a mascot.
#4: Swoop (Philadelphia Eagles)
With his breakout supporting role in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, Swoop and star power go hand in hand. I’ve got no complaints about Swoop’s design, as he checks off practically every box that a good mascot needs. Swoop also gets extra points for really doubling down on the insane stunts that most mascots don’t have the guts to tackle.
#3: Big Red (Arizona Cardinals)
Rounding out the bird based mascots, Big Red also gets everything right. He strikes that balance between being cute and athletic, and his bright red feathers are eye-catching whenever he’s on the field. Even though the Cardinals aren’t exactly a consistently good team, they’re one of the best when it comes to having a great mascot.
#2: Colt (Indianapolis Colts)
Colt is one of the NFL’s best. He’s funny, he’s entertaining, and he’s got one of the most appealing designs out of all of them. He also holds the prestigious honor of winning the “Mascot Of The Year” award four times, and I think those awards are more than warranted. This cerulean stallion really deserves his reputation. I love this guy, but I think there’s one mascot that I like just a bit more.
#1: Toro (Houston Texans)
I don’t know if this is an obvious pick for first place, but I think Toro is unmatched. His design is equal parts marketable and entertaining, and the stunts this guy does are absolutely outstanding. Being awarded “Mascot Of The Year”, having a universally recognized design and just being an overall loveable character cement Toro as my pick for the best mascot in the NFL.
